For people who are young and healthy, putting together a funeral plan may sound like a foreign and unnecessary concept, but there are many advantages to sharing and recording your funeral preferences, regardless of your age.
1. You’ll reduce stress for your family
When someone close to us passes away, grief often makes even the simplest tasks difficult. Because funerals tend to be planned immediately following a death, this often means that family members must dive immediately into planning a large event and making significant financial decisions (funeral costs can easily surpass $10,000) while dealing with enormous grief.
The more of your funeral that you plan out in advance, the easier it will be for your family to execute on your instructions and wishes. Instead of calling funeral homes and comparing caskets, they’ll be able to focus their time on supporting each other.
2. You’ll help prevent family conflict
If you pass away unexpectedly and you haven’t outlined your funeral wishes, your family will be left to guess what you would have wanted. If two family members disagree, that can lead to a lot of unnecessary tension in the funeral planning process. Even Michelle Obama has spoken about having a fight with her brother after her father’s death over whether to get a basic or fancy casket.
Even if you’re certain you’ve mentioned to your family that you’d prefer cremation over a burial (or vice-versa), grief can cloud memory, so the more you can record, the better. This also holds true for smaller funeral decisions, down to what songs you would want played or what charity you’d prefer people make memorial donations to. Each decision that you make (and record) in advance, is one fewer decision that your family members will need to make and one fewer opportunity for family tension.
3. You’ll help ensure your wishes are met
Many people have ideas about what they would like done surrounding their death. Whether you feel that a burial is important for religious reasons or you’d prefer a lively celebration of your life over a somber affair, planning your funeral in advance will help ensure that the things you find most important will happen. It also gives you a chance to inject some of your personality into the event and reflect on how you’ll be remembered. This can provide a lot of comfort in your final days.
4. You’ll save money
Many people don’t think to shop around when they’re grieving and rushing to plan a funeral, which can lead to thousands of dollars in unnecessary costs. If you plan ahead, you can take the time to compare funeral homes, which often vary in price by thousands of dollars for almost identical services. Similarly, you’re more likely to shop around for expensive items like caskets and headstones, which can often cost about half the price when not purchased through the funeral home.
5. You’ll be able to prepare financially
Funerals are expensive, even for the savviest of shoppers with simple plans. A basic cremation with a small service will still generally cost thousands of dollars. By preparing for your funeral in advance, you’ll be able to determine exactly how much everything will cost and make a plan for how to pay for it. Once you know how much you’ll need, consider purchasing funeral insurance or putting the funds in a payable-upon-death bank account.
6. It will encourage meaningful conversations with your family
While talking to your family about death may sound uncomfortable, many people find that it leads to meaningful conversations about what’s important to each of you. Frequently, people want to talk about the end of life, but feel awkward or don’t know how to bring it up themselves. When you open the door, you may find that others in your family have been thinking about their own end of life and also want to share their thoughts and preferences.
If you’re unsure of how to bring it up, you can even use this article as an excuse. Try a line like, “I saw an article the other day on the benefits of planning your own funeral. It made me think about it a bit, and I came to the conclusion that… What would you all want?” You may end up learning things about your family that you wouldn’t have expected.
How do I make my funeral plan?
Every free will and free living trust from FreeWill gives you the option to document your funeral wishes. While funeral instructions aren’t part of the legal document that is your will or trust, it is still helpful to have documented and printed wishes so your loved ones can remember exactly what you want. These instructions should be stored in the same place as your will or trust — safe and accessible to your loved ones.
Just like with other end-of-life documents, remember that it’s perfectly fine if your wishes change over time. Once every five to ten years (or after any major life event), it’s a good idea to revisit your choices and consider whether there are any changes that you’d like to make. Just be sure to communicate the changes to your family and give them any new information. FreeWill documents are free to update and re-print over time.
